The Beauty of Team

During my corps year I witnessed two of my teammates go through the tragedy of loosing their Dad unexpectedly to cardiac issues. It was heart wrenching to watch their grief and it made me value my Dad so much more! I remember calling my Dad and saying, "I don't know what I'd do if I lost you, I don't think I'd survive it." I couldn't imagine having to live with the pain I knew my beloved teammates were experiencing. I saw their continued strength and courage each day when they arrived at Malcolm X ready to serve in 2 of our most challenging classrooms. I saw them embrace the team and our students to make it through the day. Our team came together through these tragedies and became one of the strongest and most supportive groups I have ever been a part of! It has been almost 2 years since our graduation from City Year and I know that my X family will be there for anything I may ever need.

The night my Dad died I had a desperate need to let X know what had happened around 2:30 in the morning. I sat in my living room and sent the following e-mail:

Team,

I am sorry I am sending this by email but I needed to let our team know what happened tonight and it's super late on the east coast. My Dad died tonight while riding his bike home from work. The coroner and police officer who came to my front door this evening believe it may have been a heart attack. I can't believe this happening and I knew all of you would understand what this means and what's going on. I am sitting up with my family right now; so glad I moved home in July and I am here.I love you and would appreciate any thoughts and prayers for me and my family. I am so sorry I am having you all wake up to this. I just needed to know X was out there

The responses started flowing back to me immediately and I knew there were people out there who we embracing me and grieving with me. It was remarkable how quickly each of them came to my aid and how sincere they were in their grief for me. The morning before Dad's service I could not sleep so I called Shajena. I needed to have someone tell me how to find the strength to get through Dads service and how to speak during it. I don't remember what Shajena and I spoke about that morning but I felt peace. I knew she understood it, she loved me, and that she believed I was capable of doing this; it made all the difference to me.

When my corps member lost her Mom in November I was in shock. I was on my way to Lindsey's rehearsal dinner in Baltimore and the knowledge that my corps member was having to go through this was excruciating for me. How could this be happening twice in 3 years? How on earth had Shanon handle his TL year when 2 of his corps members lost parents?!?! How was I going to find the strength to help Nuni?

Nuni called me that evening during a layover in Dallas and asked me, "what I am suppose to do? what happens now?" The pure vulnerability and grief in her voice pulled me back in time to August 30, 2011 and I couldn't answer her. I didn't have any magic words to offer so I just stayed on the phone. I talked her through finding a place that sold tea, a place to sit, and listened to her trying to figure out the best way to tell her sister that their Mom died. I felt totally helpless and out of control again.

My team has rallied around both of us this year. They have been remarkable as individuals and as a group. They make me laugh every day! They are kind to each other, flexible, compassionate, and full of an optimistic energy that has impacted our school more than any PBIS initiative this year. They remind me of X.

City Year provides you the opportunity to serve on diverse teams and to learn from others around you. But it takes a special team to develop into a family; to laugh with each other, to respect each other, and to find genuine enjoyment from working with each other! I love walking into my team room every morning knowing I will be greeted by some of the best people I know. I love sending e-mails to X and knowing we are still a family. I love City Year for giving me the opportunity to be a part of these teams and to learn from each of them. And I will be forever grateful that these people surrounded me during my grief and that they have helped shape me into the woman I am.